timing

i am learning that my timing and expectations are imperfect and random and ever-changing. but it's okay. my perspective is being lovingly guided toward realistic expectation...and...rest (in Christ).

i'm pretty far behind at this point, friends (in my reading and writing). have been needing to focus on seminary assignments and homeschooling and home...but am truly sad that this study has felt neglect. :/ have an unfinished blog on judges and ruth to complete and post...but the youversion plan has us in first kings already. :) i am so sorry! i just wanted to post this morning to let you know that my intention is to catch this up! i have trust-issues with my expectations at this point...:), but wanted to communicate that the delay is not intentional and am hoping for miraculous blocks of unexpected focus time (which He has been so faithful to provide in my previous experience.)

in my imperfection, God's timing is perfect...and in all of the imperfections of this life...He is working and moving and using circumstances to love us. i just have to share this...i mentioned that i've been attentive to issues of home recently...a project for this spring has been to bring order to the exterior of our home. outdoor toy messes and elementary-aged-boy-forts needing disassembly received my attention this past week. :) and these decluttering projects turned into hanging swings and spreading mulch and creating a much better play area for the kids. so....an unplanned trip to lowes for a few needed items ended in one of those God's-timing-is-perfect moments. i checked out with a sweet twenty-something cashier and realized as i was leaving...just looking over the receipt that she hadn't charged me for something. so, when i went back to make it right...she just started talking to me. she'd just broken up with a boyfriend of 10 months and was broken-hearted. i was able to listen...because she just needed someone to hear. at the end of our conversation, the Lord brought to mind the simplest of psalms and hope for her brokenness. 147:3...He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds. so...as i left her with misty eyes and His Word-encouragement (which far surpasses any thought of my own)...i was blown away by His timing and His heart for her and the way He moved me to work on this yard project and make an unexpected/unplanned trip to the hardware store (even the choice of lowes in high point or kernersville? was evidence of His moving me to be where this sweet girl was working!)...i'm soooooo in love with Jesus and His timing. He is in control, and He is sovereign. and i believe proverbs 16:3...commit your works to the Lord and your plans will be established. so...when i feel inadequate or insecure about unmet stephanie-expectations, i want to rest in this thought...that HIS TIMING IS PERFECT.

so thankful for this year...and for His Word...looking forward to hours in first and second samuel!...

you are loved!

judges and ruth

chapters of history to learn from...

--old testament understanding--

i'm going to just jump right in to chapter 2: an angel of the Lord came to the israelites and said (verses 2-3), "'I brought you up out of egypt and led you into the land which i have sworn to your fathers; and i said, 'I will never break My covenant with you, and as for you, you shall make no covenant with the inhabitants of this land; you shall tear down their altars.' but you have not obeyed Me; what is you have done? therefore I also said, 'I will not drive them out before you; but they will become as thorns in your sides and their gods will be a snare to you.'" we read in chapter one that the israelites did not drive out the peoples of the lands as they were instructed. please recall our thoughts about why they were to drive these groups of people out completely. the evil in these cultures was to be dealt with/to be ended. altars to their gods were to be torn down. if they were left...and if the people involved in idolatry were left to live in the land with the israelites, there existed the possibility that the israelites would be influenced to worship their gods. and they did. 2:11 says, "then the sons of israel did evil in the sight of the Lord and served the baals." 2:16 says, "they played the harlot after other gods and bowed themselves down to them." 3:7 says, "the sons of israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord, and forgot the Lord their God and served the baals and the asheroth."

heartbreaking.

so, chapter 2 records joshua's death and burial. judges were raised up to lead. we see in chapter 3 that when the israelites broke God's heart engaging in idolatry that "He sold them" (3:8) and "the sons of israel served cushan-rishathaim eight years." and we'll see this pattern throughout judges of God's people serving the baals and walking through/working and serving through...slaving their way through the consequences of turning to false gods...and crying out to the Lord...each time seeing Him as their great Rescuer.

/3:9 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"----------------"the Lord raised up a deliverer"

/3:12 "the sons of israel again did evil in the sight of the Lord"

/3:15 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"----------------"the Lord raised up a deliverer"

/4:1 "the sons of israel again did evil in the sight of the Lord"

/4:3 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"-----------v 23 "so God subdued on that day jabin the king of canaan before the sons of israel"

/6:1 "then the sons of israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord"

/6:6 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"-------------v 8 "the Lord sent a prophet to the sons of israel"

/8:28 "so midian was subdued before the sons of israel"

/8:33"the sons of israel again played the harlot with the baals, and made baal-berith their god. thus the sons of israel did not remember the Lord their God".........

in the midst of this idolatry/repentance cycle, we are encouraged by faithful acts of some who did act heroically in faith. deborah. gideon. i loved reading the story of gideon. unsuspected leader/not in a high position. courageous in response to the angel's visit and confident in God's faithfulness. gideon was imperfect but used by God.

we read in chapter 9 the treachery of abimelech who killed all of his brothers except jotham... and the justice of God at the end of this story once again. following abimilech's death, 9:56 records that "God repaid the wickedness of abimelech." chapter 10 gives the account of two judges, tola and jair. then, v 6 says, "then the sons of israel again did evil in the sight of the Lord, served the baals and the ashtaroth, the gods of aram, the gods of sidon, the gods of moab, the gods of the sons of ammon, and the gods of the philistines; thus they forsook the Lord and did not serve Him." so...the Lord "sold them into the hands of the philistines and into the hands of the sons of ammon." ...and under great oppression, v 9, "israel was greatly distressed." v 10 records the repentance, once again, of israel, and... from verse 16, "He could bear the misery of israel no longer." His heart was always for them...though they were cyclically faithless. His mercy shines out to me...and shouts out His lovingkindness. and...this is the story of the rest of judges. under the oppression of the philistines (because of their idolatry once again)...God eventually judged the philistines through samson. the last few chapters record acts that reminded me very much of sodom and gomorrah (chap 19)...and disgraceful acts led to civil war.

chapter 17 records the sobering account from verse 6, "in those days there was no king in israel; every man did what was right in his own eyes"...recorded again at the end of the book (the very last verse), 21:25.

let me quickly move on to the encouragement of ruth's story. :) this is a record of the line of david through whom Jesus would be born. ruth was a testimony of faithfulness...loyal to her widowed mother-in-law (widowed herself)...she went to bethlehem and because of her acts of faithfulness became the wife of boaz. and the son of ruth and boaz was obed, the father of jesse, the father of david (king david).

--personal thoughts--

all of this is so sobering. reading judges was just...sad to me. just observing the weakness of men...sin and idolatry and faithlessness...can be so overwhelmingly sad. but i want to read it and reflect with hope in the goodness of God. He took them back...and back and back. He rescued them from oppressors when they cried to Him. He was faithful and is faithful.

thank You for Your continuous, neverending, grace-overflowing, love-outpouring faithfulness, God...to the israelites...and to me. thank You, Father.

God is just

...if He weren't...we couldn't trust Him. when the israelites served other gods, there were consequences. but He was ever ever faithful...and is to us because His character is faithfulness!

i have fallen behind friends. i am hopeful for time-redemption (thinking of ruth this morning...) :)...i am learning to manage my time with two graduate school classes presently in addition to the responsibilities of homeschooling/etc...i am so sorry! for falling behind. i am ready to write today...catching up on reading/study, but do not have time this morning to blog it out. i just wanted to put a note in here of apology for falling behind.

we should be finishing up our reading in first samuel today. huge love to you and i hope hope hope to be back soon to write out lots of thoughts....