a prayer as i read.

my prayer this morning
as i've been reading kings and chronicles in chunks...large portions at a time. and asking You to speak to me...if i have read it with a bowed heart. a reverent heart...i have been moved by Your faithfulness. if i have allowed any whisper-question...if i have wondered what a muslim might think about this passage or that...it is deception.

let me submit, Lord.  i do not want to think like those opposed to You, Jesus. i do not want to imagine what they may think of Your Word and the battles and the wars.  if i think that You are just one god that is demanding among many, i may be deceived. but You are not. You are God in heaven. Creator God. the ONLY GOD.  all other deception and the loyalty to any other created thing is in opposition to my heart. satan in his deception hates me.  and he hates culture and india and china and russia and iraq and iran.  and he has disguised himself as muhammad and buddha and celebrity and sports (if exalted in my head) and idolatry in every form.

unveil our eyes, Lord.  i read in kings and chronicles Your rescue for those who seek You.  Your faithfulness to protect and route the enemies of those who seek You...and Your lifted hand from those who turn. for those who forsake You.  Your loyalty-demand was for the good of those who sought You.  the other gods...the baals...and their deceived and deceiving prophets required child-sacrifice and all sorts of evil and harmful practices that satan prompted because of his hate. You would protect me from this evil, Father. Caregiver. Faithful Lover of my heart and my children and my way.

i know Your story and deception is satan's only offense.  protect me from the lies of the enemy of my heart.

please arrest my thought and captivate my heart, Savior, Jesus.

just two verses...oh, and a few after that

quick post this morn...looking over my notes for first kings...when i read this in the summer, i jotted out two verses and stuck them on my frig (still there):  first kings 8:57-58...

"may the Lord our God be with us, as He was with our fathers; may He not leave us or forsake us, that He may incline our hearts to Himself, to walk in all His ways and to keep His commandments and His statutes and His ordinances, which He commanded our Fathers." (italics mine)

reading further into the context of chapter eight again, i came across the following:  "and may these words of mine, with which i have made supplication before the Lord, be near to the Lord our God day and night, that He may maintain the cause of His servant and the cause of His people israel, as each day requires, so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the Lord is God; there is no one else..." (italics mine again).  i love solomon's prayer.  he is bold to ask that his prayer would "be near to the Lord...day and night"!!  and the prayer is perfect.  we know this prayer is in line with the will of God, because he is asking that their cause would be maintained for the glory of God, "that all the peoples of the earth may know that the Lord is God." what stood out to me the most is this phrase:  as each day requires.  

if i pray that God would maintain the "cause of His servant" and if my purposes in life are to make Him famous...and i pray this specific to the day (as each day requires)...He will be faithful to answer and to keep my prayer close.  i believe this.

in light of my yesterdays...(the most recent yesterday/very tear-filled yesterday especially ;)  )...each day, i pray that He will provide what each day requires...for His glory.

back to reading and writing. :) first samuel.

well, it is now almost mid-september, and i began this post in early july. ahh,well *my personal thoughts below still ring true.* :)  maybe crazy, but i still want to attempt to read through revelation by december 31.  notes may be more condensed and maybe a bit less researched (as i started out, i really wanted to include thoughts from teaching texts that i am studying but this time around and for the fall and early winter, it will probly be a quick read and more of overview and highlights).  my desire is to go through the bible again next year and the next and the next...so more depth will come, i'm sure.  second timothy 3:16 says, "all Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness."  and hebrews 4:12 breathes life: "the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart." the bible changes us from the inside-out and reaches deep to the core/"the thoughts and intentions of the heart"...we need to be looking into it...digesting it...consuming it...

it is life.

so, here are my thoughts from july and completed this morning:

--personal thoughts--
hi, friends! ahhh...good to be writing. :)  i just reread my last few posts and confess to you, my plans were kind of a big fail.  good plans/to be graciously modified again. it's all good.  if i didn't believe in second chances, i definitely would not have attempted to blog-write through my bible-reading in a year. :)  so...i haven't caught up yet/not even close, but will begin blogging again.  :)  today, first samuel, and after i post thoughts through esther (last book of history)...i will let youversion re-age my plan (or whatever it does) to put me on track to still finish in 2012. i'm a couple months behind at this point, so it could end up being good chunks of the Word daily but i'm up for it if you are! :)  thank you so so sooo much for sticking with me. :)

oh...catching myself back up to this, i just took the time to reread many of the thoughts i had written from joshua through may 4...i'm so very blown away by God's faithfulness.  is this personal to you, friends, as it is to me???  if He is faithful to israel, He is faithful.  and if He is faithful, then He is faithful to me.  let's consider first samuel....

--old testament understanding--
first samuel starts off, of course, with the story of samuel...hannah, his mother, and his dedication at the temple.  her song in chapter 2 speaks of hannah's faith.  i love how she refers to God as a rock, a reminder to me of charlie hall's song: my brightness.  His love is like a rock when i'm spinning.  hannah's life was barren. literally...until the Lord blessed her with samuel, and she saw Him as her rock. 1:2 reads, "there is no one holy like the Lord. indeed, there is no one besides You, nor is there any rock like our God."  and He blesses...as with children in her story (she had five more)!

we are introduced to the wickedness of eli's sons in chapter 2, and eli's faith is evident through the record of his death in chapter 4. in these important chapters, note the required reverence for the ark of God and detriment of those who neglected that.  so incredible that the philistine's god, dagon, fell on its face before the ark of the Lord!  and the story of the return of the ark after having been captured is fascinating (when the cows walked with it toward beth-shemesh and to the levites).  chapter 7 records israel's deliverance from the philistines and samuel's faithful leadership and ministry. note that deliverance followed the people's return to the Lord (7:4).

chapter eight records the israelites' demand for a king and warning follows.

--and...at this point, i'm realizing the lengthiness of this book/and books to follow. i will not try to touch on every chapter or recorded event, but summarize and hit highlights.--

saul was chosen as king. ammonites were defeated, and saul gave God credit, "the Lord accomplished deliverance in israel." (11:13).  samuel was recognized as faithful and respected. chapter 12 records when samuel prayed for thunder and rain, and thunder and rain followed!  (12:18)  samuel pleaded with the people, "only fear the Lord and serve Him in truth with all your heart; for consider what great things He has done for you" (12:24).  we see constant warfare during saul's reign (14:47).  jonathan, his son, was introduced in chapters 13 and 14.  then...saul was disobedient, and samuel grieved (chapter 15).  chapter 16 records david's anointing by samuel.  note 16:7, "'do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature...God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.'"  so sorry for the reference, but this reminds me of marvel's captain america.  :) chosen for his heart.  and david displayed his heart when his faith in God fed bravery to stand up to goliath in chapter 17.  all for the glory of God (see the very end of v. 46, "all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel.")  narrative of saul, david, and jonathan follows in consecutive chapters.  the animosity of saul toward david was intense, and david ran from him for his life. twice, david had opportunity to kill saul and spared his life. honorable.  (see 24:10 and 26:9).  david's heart for israel was intense.  he fought for israel...risking his life over and over and over.  chapter 30 records his victory over the amalekites. i love the end of verse 6...it is inspiration: "David strengthened himself in the Lord his God." and to conclude first samuel, chapter 31 records the death of saul and his sons.

happy day, friends.  bless you...

more timing thoughts

hi, friends!  i have a plan for the samuels, kings, and chronicles. :)  i am sooooo sorry to leave you hanging in these history books.  history is my life right now as i am finishing a class on church history. :)  i love the idea that history is HIStory though and love studying it. :)  so....i'm still in kings in my reading but am thinking the best thing for these six books will be to summarize and touch on key points when i get caught up through the chronicles (which will put us through to mid-may).  ezra should be starting around the 20th...so between now and that weekend, i hope to be writing and will try to post summary thoughts on these books as we move toward completion of the books of history and move into books of poetry.

i am reaaaallly sorry for the inconsistency in blogging through these books.  thank you so much for sticking with me and understanding.  love to you...

(oh, and i wanted to make sure that you knew i had completed the post on judges and ruth...i had started it/then just went back and added to the post when i was ready to complete it...so, it's like two posts ago. :)....)

timing

i am learning that my timing and expectations are imperfect and random and ever-changing. but it's okay. my perspective is being lovingly guided toward realistic expectation...and...rest (in Christ).

i'm pretty far behind at this point, friends (in my reading and writing). have been needing to focus on seminary assignments and homeschooling and home...but am truly sad that this study has felt neglect. :/ have an unfinished blog on judges and ruth to complete and post...but the youversion plan has us in first kings already. :) i am so sorry! i just wanted to post this morning to let you know that my intention is to catch this up! i have trust-issues with my expectations at this point...:), but wanted to communicate that the delay is not intentional and am hoping for miraculous blocks of unexpected focus time (which He has been so faithful to provide in my previous experience.)

in my imperfection, God's timing is perfect...and in all of the imperfections of this life...He is working and moving and using circumstances to love us. i just have to share this...i mentioned that i've been attentive to issues of home recently...a project for this spring has been to bring order to the exterior of our home. outdoor toy messes and elementary-aged-boy-forts needing disassembly received my attention this past week. :) and these decluttering projects turned into hanging swings and spreading mulch and creating a much better play area for the kids. so....an unplanned trip to lowes for a few needed items ended in one of those God's-timing-is-perfect moments. i checked out with a sweet twenty-something cashier and realized as i was leaving...just looking over the receipt that she hadn't charged me for something. so, when i went back to make it right...she just started talking to me. she'd just broken up with a boyfriend of 10 months and was broken-hearted. i was able to listen...because she just needed someone to hear. at the end of our conversation, the Lord brought to mind the simplest of psalms and hope for her brokenness. 147:3...He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds. so...as i left her with misty eyes and His Word-encouragement (which far surpasses any thought of my own)...i was blown away by His timing and His heart for her and the way He moved me to work on this yard project and make an unexpected/unplanned trip to the hardware store (even the choice of lowes in high point or kernersville? was evidence of His moving me to be where this sweet girl was working!)...i'm soooooo in love with Jesus and His timing. He is in control, and He is sovereign. and i believe proverbs 16:3...commit your works to the Lord and your plans will be established. so...when i feel inadequate or insecure about unmet stephanie-expectations, i want to rest in this thought...that HIS TIMING IS PERFECT.

so thankful for this year...and for His Word...looking forward to hours in first and second samuel!...

you are loved!

judges and ruth

chapters of history to learn from...

--old testament understanding--

i'm going to just jump right in to chapter 2: an angel of the Lord came to the israelites and said (verses 2-3), "'I brought you up out of egypt and led you into the land which i have sworn to your fathers; and i said, 'I will never break My covenant with you, and as for you, you shall make no covenant with the inhabitants of this land; you shall tear down their altars.' but you have not obeyed Me; what is you have done? therefore I also said, 'I will not drive them out before you; but they will become as thorns in your sides and their gods will be a snare to you.'" we read in chapter one that the israelites did not drive out the peoples of the lands as they were instructed. please recall our thoughts about why they were to drive these groups of people out completely. the evil in these cultures was to be dealt with/to be ended. altars to their gods were to be torn down. if they were left...and if the people involved in idolatry were left to live in the land with the israelites, there existed the possibility that the israelites would be influenced to worship their gods. and they did. 2:11 says, "then the sons of israel did evil in the sight of the Lord and served the baals." 2:16 says, "they played the harlot after other gods and bowed themselves down to them." 3:7 says, "the sons of israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord, and forgot the Lord their God and served the baals and the asheroth."

heartbreaking.

so, chapter 2 records joshua's death and burial. judges were raised up to lead. we see in chapter 3 that when the israelites broke God's heart engaging in idolatry that "He sold them" (3:8) and "the sons of israel served cushan-rishathaim eight years." and we'll see this pattern throughout judges of God's people serving the baals and walking through/working and serving through...slaving their way through the consequences of turning to false gods...and crying out to the Lord...each time seeing Him as their great Rescuer.

/3:9 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"----------------"the Lord raised up a deliverer"

/3:12 "the sons of israel again did evil in the sight of the Lord"

/3:15 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"----------------"the Lord raised up a deliverer"

/4:1 "the sons of israel again did evil in the sight of the Lord"

/4:3 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"-----------v 23 "so God subdued on that day jabin the king of canaan before the sons of israel"

/6:1 "then the sons of israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord"

/6:6 "the sons of israel cried to the Lord"-------------v 8 "the Lord sent a prophet to the sons of israel"

/8:28 "so midian was subdued before the sons of israel"

/8:33"the sons of israel again played the harlot with the baals, and made baal-berith their god. thus the sons of israel did not remember the Lord their God".........

in the midst of this idolatry/repentance cycle, we are encouraged by faithful acts of some who did act heroically in faith. deborah. gideon. i loved reading the story of gideon. unsuspected leader/not in a high position. courageous in response to the angel's visit and confident in God's faithfulness. gideon was imperfect but used by God.

we read in chapter 9 the treachery of abimelech who killed all of his brothers except jotham... and the justice of God at the end of this story once again. following abimilech's death, 9:56 records that "God repaid the wickedness of abimelech." chapter 10 gives the account of two judges, tola and jair. then, v 6 says, "then the sons of israel again did evil in the sight of the Lord, served the baals and the ashtaroth, the gods of aram, the gods of sidon, the gods of moab, the gods of the sons of ammon, and the gods of the philistines; thus they forsook the Lord and did not serve Him." so...the Lord "sold them into the hands of the philistines and into the hands of the sons of ammon." ...and under great oppression, v 9, "israel was greatly distressed." v 10 records the repentance, once again, of israel, and... from verse 16, "He could bear the misery of israel no longer." His heart was always for them...though they were cyclically faithless. His mercy shines out to me...and shouts out His lovingkindness. and...this is the story of the rest of judges. under the oppression of the philistines (because of their idolatry once again)...God eventually judged the philistines through samson. the last few chapters record acts that reminded me very much of sodom and gomorrah (chap 19)...and disgraceful acts led to civil war.

chapter 17 records the sobering account from verse 6, "in those days there was no king in israel; every man did what was right in his own eyes"...recorded again at the end of the book (the very last verse), 21:25.

let me quickly move on to the encouragement of ruth's story. :) this is a record of the line of david through whom Jesus would be born. ruth was a testimony of faithfulness...loyal to her widowed mother-in-law (widowed herself)...she went to bethlehem and because of her acts of faithfulness became the wife of boaz. and the son of ruth and boaz was obed, the father of jesse, the father of david (king david).

--personal thoughts--

all of this is so sobering. reading judges was just...sad to me. just observing the weakness of men...sin and idolatry and faithlessness...can be so overwhelmingly sad. but i want to read it and reflect with hope in the goodness of God. He took them back...and back and back. He rescued them from oppressors when they cried to Him. He was faithful and is faithful.

thank You for Your continuous, neverending, grace-overflowing, love-outpouring faithfulness, God...to the israelites...and to me. thank You, Father.

God is just

...if He weren't...we couldn't trust Him. when the israelites served other gods, there were consequences. but He was ever ever faithful...and is to us because His character is faithfulness!

i have fallen behind friends. i am hopeful for time-redemption (thinking of ruth this morning...) :)...i am learning to manage my time with two graduate school classes presently in addition to the responsibilities of homeschooling/etc...i am so sorry! for falling behind. i am ready to write today...catching up on reading/study, but do not have time this morning to blog it out. i just wanted to put a note in here of apology for falling behind.

we should be finishing up our reading in first samuel today. huge love to you and i hope hope hope to be back soon to write out lots of thoughts....

judges and ruth

hi friends! happy sunday...i can't wait to blog about gideon, samson...ruth! i will probably not be able to post today, but will as soon as possible. just wanted to say hello, and i love you!....

(we are reading ruth today and will start first samuel tomorrow :)...)

joshua 9-24. God is faithful.

--old testament understanding--

i'm excited to blog this morning. the Lord is near (phil. 4:5b). so...starting with chapter 9, let's really listen for what God wants us to understand as we look at the rest of joshua. the kings who were "beyond the Jordan, in the hill country and in the lowland and on all the coast of the Great Sea" (v 1)...heard of how God was giving the israelites favor. they heard about jericho and were afraid. so, the people of gibeon attempted to trick joshua (and succeeded). i think the key thing we can learn from this section of text is that they "did not ask for the counsel of the Lord" (v 14b). it was believable that these people were from a far country and seemed reasonable to promise peace/to make a covenant with them as they requested. even when things seem reasonable and good, we need to be on the alert (i pet. 5:8).

i love how God fought for them all along the way. i know i've read this before but did not remember that God actually threw large stones from heaven (hailstones)...on the five kings and their armies who had come against them (recorded in chap 10). here, also, is recorded that the sun "stopped in the middle of the sky and did not hasten to go down for about a whole day." so...when you read this, did you think about this scientifically (astronomically:) )? of course, this was a figurative expression because we know the reason it looks like the sun rises and sets is a result of the earth's rotation/not the actual movement of the sun. so, the earth stopped rotating for a day? very cool. i imagine the hand of God just coming and His finger kind of resting on the north pole gently for several hours..."until the nation avenged themselves of their enemies" (v 13). soooo beautiful how it's just all in His hand...and in His control. (and...my faith just keeps being rocked and shaped and enlarged and confirmed and strengthened chapter after chapter). and...southern palestine...and...northern palestine were conquered under joshua's leadership (chap 10/11). chapter 12 lists kings that had been defeated by israel and 13 records how canaan was divided by tribes. caleb comes back on the scene in chapter 14 with a request for the territory that he desired for his family. to note about caleb...the affirmation in verse 9 "...i followed the Lord my God fully." and...i love how his strength and health had been sustained into old age (similar to moses').

i don't have a lot to really comment about the divisions of land recorded in chapters 15-20. each tribe was given space and territory...including the levites in chap 21. chap 20 records how the six cities of refuge had been set aside as well. i love 21:34, "not one of the good promises which the Lord had made to the house of israel failed; all came to pass." in my margin beside chapter 22, i have written: it was relationship then too.... note verse 5: "only be very careful to observe the commandment and the law which moses the servant of the Lord commanded you, to love the Lord your God and walk in all His ways and keep His commandments and hold fast to Him and serve Him with all your heart and with all your soul." (what does it look like for me...today...to hold fast to Him?) chapter 22 records a misunderstanding concerning an altar built near the jordan. remember that reuben and gad and the half-tribe of manasseh had settled on the other side of river. and...they built this altar as a reminder to generations after them that though the jordan divided them geologically, they were to follow after God as the rest of israelites.

chapter 23 records joshua's farewell thoughts to the people. "...you are to cling to the Lord your God..." (v 8). this stands out/shouts out to me this morning...he instructed/reminded them again to love the Lord (through verse 10). in chapter 24, joshua reviews israel's history...written record of the Lord's faithfulness again. the well-known proclamation in verse 15 is significant. "choose for yourselves today whom you will serve...." and they did verbally affirm that they would choose the Lord as joshua had...and...he warned them with urgency not to follow after other gods. joshua's death is, of course, recorded at the end of the book.

--personal thoughts--

i want to cling to the Lord/to hold fast to Him. for me...today...this means trekking through His Word and turning my heart toward Him in the quiet (and in the intermittent noisy of the reid home today). :)

faithful Father, let us cling to you....

intimacy

--old testament understanding--

well...though i've felt along this journey of reading this year that daily postings could benefit us the most, i am realizing that when i look over large portions of text and kind of see the big picture more...that there is value in this too. when we look at joshua and the victories of the israelites' conquests, the power of God and His moving them in battle testifies to His faithfulness and to His sovereignty. that He moves nations in battle/that He turns the course of nations and war is faith-stirring. of course, the Maker of it all can do anything...anything. and what strikes me this morning is that He was intimate with them and kept communicating love and an urgency for them to love Him. chapter 22:5b says, "...love the Lord your God and walk in all His ways and keep His commandments and hold fast to Him and serve Him with all your heart and with all your soul." chapter 23:8 says, "...you are to cling to the Lord your God, as you have done to this day." (italics mine). chapter 23:11 says, "so take diligent heed to yourselves to love the Lord your God."

the old testament (as we've seen in the books of law and history so far)...communicates the beauty of intimacy with God....

to be continued....

joshua 1-8.

--old testament understanding--

copied from previous post:

so, joshua 1 introduced us to israel's new leader...who accepted the challenge with strength and courage. joshua was enabled to lead the israelites on the mission to bring them into the land. i love verse 13, "...'the Lord your God gives you rest (reminds me of david crowder* band's last cd :) ) and will give you this land.'" chapter 2 records rahab's part in the story of their conquest...here in jericho. her talk with the israelite spies clues us in to the respect for the israelites and their God that the people had...they had heard how God had moved/how the waters of the red sea had moved for them/how they had just defeated the two amorite cities.... she said when they heard about how they wiped out these cities that their "hearts melted and no courage remained in any man any longer."

picking up at chapter 3 following rahab's heroic acts in chapter 2:

so, when the "soles of the feet of the priests...rest in the waters of the jordan, the waters of the jordan will be cut off" (v 13). chapter 3 records the israelites' crossing of the jordan river. definitely steps of faith for these men of faith carrying the ark of the covenant. :) chapter 4 records their placement of memorial stones to remember this miracle when the waters stood still for them. chapter 5 records that the israelites were circumcised (these were of the generation who were born in the wilderness and had not been circumcised). i love verse 9 which states, "then the Lord said to joshua, 'today i have rolled away the reproach of egypt from you.'" this was a new start and a new beginning for the nation of israel.

as the conquest of jericho is recorded in chapter 6, looking back to the spies' conversation with rahab gives perspective. this city was fearful of the israelites and would fall easily. chapters 7 and 8 record israel's initial defeat and later conquest of ai. in chapter 7, achan was made an example before israel as he was stoned for his crimes.

--personal thoughts---

you are loved. :)

when You hear our cries...sing through the night

--personal thoughts--

i'm not completely sure my last post made a lot of sense. i just reread it and am moved again by how God was speaking to me, but i definitely want to communicate it well (better?) so that i'm not the only one benefitting from these thoughts. :) the song again...if you want to keep it open in another window (with lyrics accessible)...www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXOAA0dNjPk.

i just want to share my heart with you. i have been grieving for a couple years. because of life circumstances and loss...i've felt quite sorrowful...i guess actually more than a couple of years. and of course...it has been off and on. i am sooooo blessed and have soooooo much to be thankful for...but have seen a lot of heartache and have had my eyes opened to a lot of pain. and...there is a season for grief...which i think i'm coming out of now (it's time). but...the emotions that i've experienced have felt overwhelming at times. paralyzing at times. confusing. unbearable at times. i just want to share how the old testament has been healing to me.... during this season, i have felt tempted to let my sorrow make me feel distanced from God. i've had questions. though i never questioned the goodness of God, my heart just didn't understand a lot. this is the thing...the thing that i've learned...through christy's song and through this epic story of God's faithfulness to lead the israelites.... His heart aches for the pain in the world. when we ache...He does. and when we grieve, His heart grieves with us. and i think sometimes, He opens our eyes so that we will grieve with Him.

when christy introduced the song at passion in january, she said it started out as a lullaby...just as she would grieve in her heart...and she was just asking God to comfort. all the things our hands cannot touch/our arms/hugs cannot reach. wrap Your arms around the world tonight. look at the words for a second..."when You hear our cries...sing through the night so we can join in Your song and sing along...." when we were reading about sodom and gomorrah, the word outcry just stood out to me (genesis 19:13). wickedness and evil lead to pain. hurting people crying out for mercy.... so, through this song, christy is asking God to sing so we can hear it and sing along.

and i realized as i was reading about the conquests as they came into their promised land, that pain and devastation were being dealt with as in sodom and gomorrah. remember deuteronomy 12:31...they burned "their sons and daughters in the fire to their gods." when there was only evil all the time in noah's day, there was a flood. when the outcry of sodom and gomorrah became great, there was fire from heaven. and in response to the "abominable acts" which the nations that the israelites dispossessed engaged in, God sent in His people to conquer. to wipe them out. to end the grievousness and devastation. and this time, His people were seeing face to face and sword to sword the results of sin in these cultures. it must have been horrific. seeing the altars where children were sacrificed and being responsible to destroy them.

i can speculate concerning the israelites' grief for all of this. and i can relate. and...i can relate to their sharing with God...the grief that He had for the devastation of fallen/broken man. but there was also hope that in that culture, in that place, the pain would cease. idolatry that bred wickedness was being quenched as they conquered the land.

so...let's look at the hope in christy's song.

From the farthest corners of the earth

Still His mercy reaches
Even to the pain we cannot see
And even through the darkness
There's a promise that will keep us
There is One who came to set us free...

So let Your song rise
And fill up the earth
Let Your hope ring out
Let Your heart be heard

hope came to rescue fallen/broken man. Christ came...and sin and death and hell and the grave have been conquered. and there is a way out of the devastation and brokenness through Jesus.

so, as i run out of this season of grief...i know that He has cried with me. but/and...the song that He sings over me/over us...is not a ballad of sadness or heartache. but a song of hope. because Jesus is remedy to the broken. praise the Lord...praise God who hears the outcry and sings over us...hope.

great God...wrap Your arms around the world tonight

--personal thoughts--

hi, friends. i want to start this morning by saying thank you, again and again, for reading the bible with me and for reading these posts! you have no idea what this has meant to me.... i had an idea what it was going to look like in december when i decided to commit to this, but i see it a bit more clearly now and know what will work for me at this time in my life. my expectation and hope was to blog everyday as i read...and i don't want to let this go. i think this is the ideal, and i want to hope for this consistency. i just want to express to you an apology for not meeting the expectations that i kind of started with in january...i don't want to give up on this ideal and will keep trying. :) thank you so much for hangin in with me and encouraging my heart along the way.

today, what i want to do is write about the first 8 chapters of joshua this morning and come back this evening to continue through maybe 16.... then pick up tomorrow through 24 and begin judges. this weekend, i want to find myself reading and studying my old testament survey text and putting some thoughts on here to give perspective on these books that have just seemed to be such quick reads. so, for your expectation...and my goals for this weekend, this is my hope. :)

as we open our eyes and hearts to the israelites' move into their promised land...to the battles fought, set backs, victories...to this dramatic way to fulfill what God set before His people.... this is a stretch this morning, but i have to tell you that i awoke with a song that i just have to share with you as we study. here is the link as we quietly look at these passages this morning and through the weekend: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXOAA0dNjPk

all throughout history, God has been interested and involved in the story that He created! there is sadness and heartache because of the introduction of sin/because of the fall of man in the garden (genesis 3) and because everyone is born into sin (romans 3:23)...but i believe He hears the outcry. i just want to emphasize again the idea that these nations were "dispossessed" because of their wickedness (as recorded in deut. 9:4-5/12:31). it has seemed to me as i've read that there can come a point in time/in a culture of pain (because of wickedness/sin) when God has had to say, "that's enough. it's over. this has to end." the flood. sodom and gomorrah. and these nations that israel came in to conquer....

i believe He hears the outcry! and i believe that when our hearts break because we hear it!... that we can run to Him...and cry with Him...and sing with Him.

--old testament understanding and continued overwhelming thoughts!--

this morning, i am seeing this in a new way. ahhhh***i've never ever heard the israelites' conquest of the promised land spoken of in this way...i'm still processing this, and i don't even really know how to write this and explain it the way that it's resounding in my head...but could it be? that yes, this all was a fulfillment of a promise to abraham and bringing His people into a new land after 400 years of slavery. but! could it also be that God was dealing with devastation of these cultures of child-sacrifice (deut. 12:31) and evil and that He was allowing His people to accomplish this mission with Him? oh man! this is why i awoke with that song so loud in my head!...

i have a lot...a lot of personal thoughts to share with you about this. how my heart and eyes have been opened during these last few years...and He's making so much make sense to me as i read His Word.

****this is just a start. i will come back when i have more time to write! below is my start on chapters 1-16 which i began before my brain started to hurt. :) **** to be continued, friends....

so, joshua 1 introduced us to israel's new leader...who accepted the challenge with strength and courage. joshua was enabled to lead the israelites on the mission to bring them into the land. i love verse 13, "...'the Lord your God gives you rest (reminds me of david crowder* band's last cd :) ) and will give you this land.'" chapter 2 records rahab's part in the story of their conquest...here in jericho. her talk with the israelite spies clues us in to the respect for the israelites and their God that the people had...they had heard how God had moved/how the waters of the red sea had moved for them/how they had just defeated the two amorite cities.... she said when they heard about how they wiped out these cities that their "hearts melted and no courage remained in any man any longer."

i'm so sorry...i have to get my kids ready for school...my brain is on overload though and i can't wait to get back to this a.s.a.p.! huge love to you....

brief joshua thoughts/introductory

--personal thoughts--

we are moving forward quickly into and through joshua. let's look of course at chapter 1, verse 9 as we begin studying this first book of history together.... (yes, we have completed the books of the law, the pentateuch...and have begun the books of history as we read through the old testament.) "be strong and courageous! [exclamation point!] do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." i would have needed these words if i'd been joshua at this time in history...and i need them now. trembling and dismay are temptations to me. i want to resist and be strong and be courageous. and i want to remember that my strength and courage are because God is with me.

amen. (right on!...as scott would say.)

i will be blogging again tomorrow about these first several chapters of joshua. rest well, friends (or good morning!)... much love to you....

deuteronomy/chapters 1-34

--personal thoughts first--
i reeeeaaally didn't mean to leave all of this for one long stephanie-commentary on this book. i feel apologetic often for being more sporadic than i really want to be...i'm so sorry! most importantly, i want to communicate that my enthusiasm is constant-present! i'm amazed and in awe and dependent on His Word! so...i will blog us through these 34 chapters tonight and tomorrow...:)...begin joshua tomorrow as well...and come back to some old testament survey/textbook study material info on leviticus, numbers and deuteronomy later in the week. so, here we go...;)

--old testament understanding--
our taste of chapter one is still on my mind and so significant...quick reminder from verses 30-31, "the Lord your God who goes before you will Himself fight on your behalf, just as He did for you in egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness where you saw how the Lord your God carried you, just as a man carries his son, in all the way which you have walked until you came to this place" (italics mine). soooo comforting and faith-inspiring. (thank You, Father...) i love chapter 2, verse 7 which speaks of His faithfulness in their wanderings (in His words)..."the Lord your God has been with you; you have not lacked a thing.'" and...the end of chap 2 and into chap 3-conquests of two cities which the Lord fought for on their behalf. (3:22: "do not fear them, for the Lord your God is the one fighting for you.") the accounts of the defeat of these two cities, heshbon and bashan, were kind of examples to the israelites...that the Lord would continue to fight for them (see 3:21). my bible entitles chapter 4, "israel urged to obey God's law." this urge/urgency is great...the cost would be so great to disobey and the reward so great to follow....i posted several days ago on v 29...a verse that is chalk-inked onto one of the art windows in our home...if they sought Him with everything...He would be found. chapter 5 repeats the 10 commandments (read to the people by moses). verse 29 is significant here as well as the Lord speaks to moses..."oh, that they had such a heart in them, that they would fear Me and keep all My commandments always, that it may be well with them and with their sons forever!" if we needed a text to illustrate that the commandments were for their good, here it is!!! that it may be well with them....

6:5 and following are epic. :) His instruction to love Him with everything and to teach His law and to display His law (on doorposts and gates) is important for us as well. chapters 7 and 8 include reminders of God's faithfulness. may i point out one short phrase that seems to shout out a theme throughout the law?...from 8:2 and then 8:18: you shall remember.... (and...we'll come back to look at 8:3 a little later.....)

i want to pause at chapter 9 to point out a faith-shaping concept here...a kind of truth that answers the questions of the heart. this one is about war and about God's activity in moving His chosen people to take out these "-ites." you know, the hittites, girgashites, amorites, canaanites, perizziites, hivites, and jebusites.... i have always wondered about this...kind of like when the united states was "peopled" by our ancestors...kind of moving native americans out of the way. (i've never known quite what to think about all of that.) so...i love this very clear answer to my questions about why it was okay for the israelites to drive people out of their occupied homes and cities. here it is in chapter 9...(and it is actually repeated twice, i assume for emphasis)...verses 4-5, "do not say in your heart when the Lord your God has driven them out before you, 'because of my righteousness the Lord has brought me in to possess this land,' but it is because of the wickedness of these nations that the Lord is dispossessing them before you." i think of sodom and gomorrah...the outcry that the Lord was responding to...i wonder if there was an outcry heard from the "-ites'"exceeding wickedness. (--personal thoughts--> wickedness produces pain. wickedness yields an outcry...sin and death-choices yield harm to people whom God created and whom He loves. we see in scripture...sodom and gomorrah/the flood/and here-->war. all-to end extremes in wickedness.) please please note later in chapter 12 (verses 29-31)...this is so very grave and serious...they burned their sons and daughters in the fire to their gods. it was extreme...and necessary to end these inconceivable practices.

chapter 10 records the account of the tablets with the 10 commandments rewritten. we have another reference in verse 13 affirming the idea that the law was for their good. (right on!) chapter 11:18-20 is an echo of 6:5-9/the epic passage. :) and...i am going to lump chapters 12 through 29 together for brevity's sake and with respect to your time tonight...these chapters include laws of the sanctuary, instructions to shun idolatry, laws about clean and unclean animals, instructions about the sabbatic year and about feasts, laws about the administration of justice in their culture, spiritism/witchcraft forbidden, instructions about cities of refuge...laws of warfare, expiation of a crime, domestic relations, and other laws...(from chapters 22-25).

chapter 26 records the admonition to give of the first fruits. chapter 27 records curses for those who disobey the law. chapter 28 records blessing for the israelites and their offspring...and consequences of disobedience. chapter 29 records a covenant given at moab...note verse 9, "...keep the words of this covenant to do them, that you may prosper in all that you do." in chapter 30 we read the encouragement of the Lord as restoration is promised. i love verse 11, "for this commandment which i command you today is not too difficult for you, nor is it out of reach...." verse 14, "the word is very near you, in your mouth and in your heart, that you may observe it." beautiful.

chapter 31 records encouragement to "be strong and courageous..." (verses 6-7 and 23). and more encouragement...as it is forewarned that they would fall away...but would remember...as in the song that moses would write. 31 also records joshua's commissioning. chapter 32 records the song of moses....i love the imagery especially in verses 10-11. again, of the eagle. chapter 33 records the blessing of moses to the tribes of israel.

and...drumroll? heehee...chapter 34. there is actually something very cool and significant as moses is remembered and his death recorded. did you notice in verse 7, it says that "although moses was one hundred and twenty years old when he died, his eye was not dim, nor his vigor abated." watch this...could this have to do with his time spent in God's presence? look back at 8:3b..."man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the Lord." i'm just wondering if moses was just a picture of health and vibrancy and vigor...even at 120...because God's presence and His words breathed life into him physically. i just love this idea/this thought that moses spent so much time directly receiving words from God (see ex. 33:11)...and i wonder if it poured life and health into his physical body. so very cool to think about. (and this idea could definitely be sooooo motivating to be in His Word and in His presence).

have i praised the Lord for His faithfulness in this post? He is worthy...

thank You, Father, for Your great great faithfulness.

quickest of quick notes to you!

ahhhh*** friends! i've left you hangin too long! there is sooo soo much to write! just a quick note this afternoon to let you know i'm on it. :) deuteronomy has blown my mind and there's so much to blog! i actually have a mid-term today that i need to study for and complete online tonight, but i'm stoked about blogging the deuteronomy thoughts that have rocked my week! will get this to you very very soon, and we'll dive into joshua together! huge love to you...!!!

deuteronomy thoughts this morning: seek and find

--old testament/personal thoughts :)--

from deuteronomy 4:29..."but from there you will seek the Lord your God, and you will find Him if you search for Him with all your heart and all your soul."

as i've been reading deuteronomy, i am overwhelmed by God's continuous faithfulness (have i written that before? hmmmm. :) ) reminder after reminder of His faithfulness. i LOVE deuteronomy! and i love this verse from chapter 4...His promise to be found. there is so much to write this morning, but limited time. i will get back to this soon...just wanted to drop a quick note in here on this tuesday morning to encourage your heart to seek.

enormous love and prayers from my heart for those reading the bible with me....

if you are behind, please rest in knowing He will give blocks of time and alertness if you desire to catch up...seek and find with me if God is leading you in this...:)

deuteronomy chapter 1

--personal thoughts--

i have just a few minutes to write this morning, so i want to just blog a taste of deuteronomy, this last book of the law. :) today's reading actually brings us all the way to chapter 13. i will try to cover 2-13 later today possibly or catch it up this weekend.

--old testament understanding--

well, the title of chapter 1 in my bible is, "israel's history after the exodus." this summary of much of what we've read is helpful....the recap is a good overview. i'm going to do something a little different in this post and just quote portions of text that i underlined as i was reading...

v 3-"in the fortieth year...."

v 5-"...moses undertook to expound the law, saying...."

v 8-"see, i have placed the land before you; go in and possess the land which the Lord swore to give to your fathers, to abraham, to isaac, and to jacob, to them and their descendants after them."

v 11-"may the Lord, the God of your fathers, increase you a thousand-fold more than you are and bless you, just as He has promised you!"

v 21-"see, the Lord your God has placed the land before you; go up, take possession, as the Lord, the God of your fathers, has spoken to you. do not fear or be dismayed."

v 30-32-"the Lord your God who goes before you will Himself fight on your behalf, just as He did for you in egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness where you saw how the Lord your God carried you, just as a man carries his son, in all the way which you have walked until you came to this place.' but for all this, you did not trust the Lord your God, who goes before you on your way, to seek out a place for you to encamp, in fire by night and cloud by day, to show you the way in which you should go." (italics mine)

v 41-"...'we have sinned against the Lord; we will indeed go up and fight, just as the Lord our God commanded us.' and every man of you girded on his weapons of war, and regarded it as easy to go up into the hill country."

so much of the above is just a treasure of His faithfulness. He never left them. He sustained their way and remembered His promise...and even encouraged their hearts (note the end of v 21-"do not fear or be dismayed."). and...the text in my italics is precious and beautiful, once again. as you remember from exodus chapter 19, when we read about God's recount of His rescue..."on eagles' wings"...here again, is a picture of God carrying His people...and the time in the wilderness. the Lord your God carried you, just as a man carries his son....

even as i type, *ahhh*...this is amazing. so awesome...when the Lord carried them on eagles' wings, it was rescue!!! here is the verse from exodus 19 (v 4...in the words of the Lord!)-"'you yourselves have seen what I did to the egyptians, and how I bore you on eagles' wings and brought you to Myself.'" and as we read in deuteronomy 1:31, they were carried in a different way. it wasn't so much the ethereal transportation from slavery and death (rescue from the armies of egypt) to safety and rescue. what we see in this passage is a man carrying his son. i picture my three-year-old on scott's shoulders at ikea. :) tired of walking. and here...the israelites were tired of the wilderness and of walking. and He carried them.

--personal thoughts--

this is sooooo personal today. to me. i'm only 37. there are some who may read this who are older (in years)...and some younger. but...i just have to tell you that i have felt tired (irregardless of my age, i guess). and i can relate to the israelites...as mad as they make me/i have conflictedness constantly as i read of their failings, because i feel my own fear and dismay. i don't think i would've questioned moses and aaron's leadership as like korah (whom the earth swallowed)...or some of the other extreme rebellious acts that we've read about...my heart is so full of reverence for God and hope in God and love for God...but i have wondered how God could overcome my timidity and questions and lead me...but here, i am reading and finding that He doesn't just do that...He carries me! and i think it's interesting that the analogy is not a son carrying his father even as we might imagine...in his elderly frailty...but a father carrying his son. i think of isaiah 40 (v 30)..."though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly." the computer screen is blurry. i'm not going to take the time to personally recount my story/our story and what all this means to my heart...but this truth that sometimes it is necessary...as it was necessary for the israelites...for a young person to feel tired/and need to be carried...is wrecking me right now (in a good way. :) )....

i love watching aiden journey ride on scott's shoulders (as i have the others when they were little).... *ahhh***another revelation this morning*...what i'm picturing isn't just a relief from walking because it's close to nap time or we've just been pushing those little legs to their limit! it is reward!..."wanna ride on daddy's shoulders?"....it's tall up their! it's adventure. it's being able to see everything/the big picture (when the view has been so limited....) He wants us to see what He has for us! and...it is holding on to daddy's head...wrapping legs and arms around His head and face/touching His face (often my kids have held on to scott's ears. lol...)...so intimate and close...and beautiful.

thank You, Father...for first rescuing us from death...and then...carrying us through life. i cannot express in words my gratitude and love. You are beautiful...both like an eagle and as our perfect Father. i love You....

numbers 14-36

--old testament understanding--

this will be an overview of chapters 14-36. one of my favorite verses in numbers is found in this fourteenth chapter, v 18, "the Lord is slow to anger and abundant in lovingkindness, forgiving iniquity and transgression...." the second half of the verse speaks of His justice as well as His lovingkindness..."He will by no means clear the guilty...." and this chapter gives account of the israelites' consequences as a result of their grumbling...that they (meaning that generation) would not be permitted to enter the promised land. chapter 15 records laws given for their entrance into canaan, laws for the "sojourner," or the one who is traveling through...and then, there is a record of a man who broke the sabbath and was stoned. at the conclusion of this chapter, we see the practice of sewing a blue tassel on the corners of their robes as a reminder "so that you may remember to do all My commandments and be holy to your God" (v 40). in the next chapter, chap 16, three of the levites challenged the leadership of moses and aaron (foolishly)...and this is the account of the earth swallowing these men and all that they had. when the people grumbled about this...still distrusting moses and aaron, there was a plague in which thousands lost their lives. in chapter 17, we read how God responded to the people's questioning and grumblings...He initiated a test to display whom God had chosen as leader. rods were collected from each of the 12 tribes, and aaron's rod (representing the levites) became miraculously distinguished among them...as buds and blossoms had grown up out of it. chapters 18-20 record duties of the levites, offering of the first fruits, and the inheritance of the levites...the ordinance of the red heifer and other laws (chap 19)...and then, the record of miriam's death, the account of water from meribah (water from a rock!), and the record of aaron's death at the end of chapter 20. the Lord helped the israelites conquer the armies of arad that had come against them...He delivered them...recorded in chap 21. and then, (this phrase baffles me...), "the people spoke against God and moses...." (after all they had seen/all they had experienced...they would dare to speak against God and against moses...crazy....) the discipline/justice of God was accomplished this time through a plague of serpents. many died when bitten by these serpents. moses interceded once again for the people and was instructed to craft a bronze serpent that would provide remedy. (see john 3:14-15!!!! Jesus...our ultimate remedy!....) then, God delivered the people again against the amorites and heshbon.

chapter 22 provides the account of balak and balaam. i love balaam's resolve, "i could not do anything either small or great, contrary to the command of the Lord my God." (v 18)...(i want this kind of obedience in my life!)...and we see his obedience later in the chapter in the midst of the very cool account of the talking donkey!...when he realized there had been an angel standing in his way, he said, "now then, if it is displeasing to you, i will turn back" (v 34). and in chapters 23 and 24, balaam prophecies according to the blessing of the Lord for israel. another quotable proclamation of balaam, "whatever the Lord speaks, that i must do..." (i just want to have this commitment to obedience...and i think it's great that we have this example of balaam's steadfastness.)

this is getting lengthy...but we are covering two-thirds of this book....:) i will try to be brief but hit the highlights...

in chapter 25, we see the sin of the israelites as they "joined themselves to baal" by playing the harlot with the daughters of moab. so, moses and the judges of israel were grieving about this, and one of the israelites brought a midianite woman (representing this culture of sin) to his relatives in their sight. one of those weeping at the tent of meeting (phineas, aaron's grandson) acted in justice against this, putting to death this man and the woman...and God was pleased that "he was jealous for his God and made atonement for the sons of israel" (v 13). chapter 26 records a census taken...601,730 sons of israel + 23,000 levites. chapter 27 records the law of inheritance and the commissioning of joshua. chapters 28-30 record the laws for offerings, offerings of the seventh month, and the law of vows (this emphasis really made me think about my commitments/vows made/carefulness with this). we read about the defeat of midian in chap 31. chapter 32 records a decision made for reuben and gad to settle in gilead (outside of canaan) because of their large numbers of livestock...with the provision that they would fight for their brothers before settling down. chapter 33 gives an overview and summary of the journey from egypt to jordan, giving account of the israelites' movement/where they camped/etc....34 records instructions for apportioning canaan. chapter 35 is an account of cities set aside for the levites and cities of refuge. and...chapter 36 records instructions of inheritance/including instructions for daughters to "marry within the family of the tribe of their father."

--personal thoughts--

as i have been writing, seated at scott's computer this morning, my children have been in and out of my bedroom...with questions...good mornings. aiden spent a good 20 min with his head on my lap...and...i took a break from writing to address a question of my oldest son, tsion. they (he and his eight-yr-old brother) have been grounded from movies/entertainment with any kind/any measure of violence (because of behaviors that needed to be addressed). so, tsion was attempting to negotiate this punishment this morning. and we talked. we talked about God and the israelites. we talked about the justice of God. and...how God did not excuse sin. i am so thankful (how do i express this gratitude?) for the bible. for His Word to us and for us. and i love that we saw often how God responded to moses' intercession for the israelites...He often withheld His hand when He saw how hearts had been changed. as far as discipine is concerned...i just want to have a heart after God's heart. Lord, i ask for discernment to know when the punishment has been effective/or needs to be curbed/when mercy needs to be shown.... i want this reverence in me to remain...and Your Word/Your character in these pages to be written on my heart as i make decisions for my children.

praying today that God is speaking to your hearts and giving discernment about the concerns of your days...through His Word...as we move into deuteronomy. :)

numbers...to the end. :)

revision to my plans for numbers...our trip north this week was extended a bit longer than i had originally planned...so i am ready to post for chapters 14-27 but am packing again for another trip this weekend...i hope it's okay to wait once again til sunday to post thoughts about numbers. it'll be good timing 'cause through chapter 36 will keep us on track through the weekend and conclude this book. (i also will be posting some additional info about leviticus at some point in the near future. :)....)

let me share quickly, though, some scriptures we read at my gma's funeral...my uncle (who spoke at the service) used portions of the bible that were special to my grandmother/each of her 7 grandchildren read one of the following psgs: john 11:20-27. psalm 23. i corinthians 15:51-58. psalm 103:8-18. i thess. 4:13-18. ecc. 3:1-8. rev. 21:1-5. i know this is random, but i just wanted to share a smidgen of my sweet experience this week with you.... :) my scripture was the john psg...key verses-26-26 (Jesus' words) "I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die...." what a wonderful, hopeful, faith-sustaining promise. i am sooooo thankful for His Word that was shared in the hearing of my friends and family....testifying to the fact that we believe grandma coleson is in heaven...because she believed in Jesus and was intimately connected to Him as a result of her faith. as i read numbers, my faith is increasing...and increasing and increasing. our God was faithful to the israelites...contending with their murmuring/not excusing it (He is just.)...but always remaining faithful to His covenant.

i hope your weekend is wonderful, friends.

numbers 14 and following....

hi, friends...wanted to drop a quick note in to let you know i will be lumping chapters 14-27 together to be posted on wednesday when i return from a quick trip to michigan. i think i'm going to take a quick break and spend some time in the NT and texts about heaven (as my grandmother has just had her eyes and heart wide-opened to what we can only dream about til it's our turn.... :) ) bless you all as you read His Word....

numbers 11-13

--personal thoughts--
when i saw the subtitle in my bible "the people complain," i really dreaded reading chapter 11. but i read it.... :) stomached it/haha...no pun intended regarding their complaints about food. :) but i've just been praying as i read....for conviction...for His voice in my heart and mind through His Word. and He is close as i think about this and pray.

--old testament understanding--
we see in chapter 11 that the people were tired (and greedy!). and they remembered times when they had other choices. and...moses was tired as we see in verses 10-15. we see that moses was provided seventy elders to assist him. and we see in chapter 11 that God responded to the people's complaints with meat...LOTS of it.

these passages are telling of God's just character and judgment. not only did God provide quail until it became "loathsome" to them (v 20)...but He struck them with a plague. and His justice was evident once again in chapter 12 as He interacted with miriam and aaron and responded to their words against moses...and miriam ended up with leprosy.

chapter 13 is important as it records the spies' obedience to "check out" the land that they would be going into.... moses' instruction was to see what it was like/what the people were like/what the cities were like/what the fruit was like. and they reported back...that the land was wonderful (they brought back enormous fruit as instructed)...and they said it "certainly does flow with milk and honey"...but that the people were strong and the cities well-fortified. caleb spoke out, however, and said that they should take possession of it (he wasn't afraid of the challenge).

--personal thoughts--
quick thoughts as we wrap up this reading...
i am comforted in God's justice. i think we would've scratched our heads and wondered why God allowed the people to get away with greed if He hadn't punished them. of course we would have. His character is just.

i am also comforted in His mercy. miriam's leprosy healed as moses pleaded (12:13)....

i am also filled with hope in caleb's courage. it is possible to be like caleb (and joshua) and not like the other fearful ten. it is possible to be like moses...very humble, more than any man who was on the face of the earth (12:3) and not like those filled with discontent and greed.

thank You, Father, for comfort and hope today. please move me to contentment and courage.

numbers 8-10

--old testament understanding--
chapter 8 begins with intro about the lampstands...then addresses the role of the levites and their sanctification for their tasks/assignments from the Lord. the levites were separate/called apart. v. 14 says, "'thus you shall separate the levites from among the sons of israel, and the levites shall be Mine." the tasks assigned to this tribe were so significant and special that God set the levites apart for their duties.

chapter 9 addresses the passover and special conditions of its observance if at all hindered (as with the specific case mentioned regarding uncleanliness because of a dead person). then, we read about the direction of God and His presence in the cloud. v. 23, "at the command of the Lord they camped, and at the command of the Lord they set out."

instructions regarding the use of trumpets for alerting the people of gathering times and of war are included in chapter 10...along with a narrative of the movement of the people as the cloud moved them from the wilderness of sinai.

--personal thoughts--
i just love how the israelites were led by the cloud. i love the visual of that. i listened to a sermon tonight with another visual of the Lord's leading...as our Shepherd whom the sheep (His people) hear/recognizing His voice (from john 10)....

thank You, Lord, for leading us...thank You that we don't need to worry about direction or when or where/or what lies ahead...we just need to follow You...our cloud by day...our Shepherd....

numbers 7

--personal thoughts--

so, did anyone else think of the twelve days of Christmas as they were reading this chapter?

on the first day of the offering, nahshon presented...

on the second day of the offering, nethaniel presented...

totals at the end of the chapter...twelve silver dishes, twelve silver bowls, twelve gold pans, etc. etc. lol...not to make light of this very reverent offering presentation spanning 12 special days. :)

i am just blown away by the magnitude of their presentation. enormous gifts. enormous presentations. i'm imagining the procession of just one of these leaders of israel with his silver dish and bowl and gold pan...the bull, the ram, the lamb, the goat, two oxen, five additional rams, five additional male goats, and five additional male lambs....

just...so beautiful and reverent. their worship was none like any that any of us have ever witnessed or experienced.

numbers 5-6

--old testament understanding--

chapter 5 opens with instruction/important instruction about lepers and others that are unclean to protect the camp...v 3..."you shall send them outside the camp so that they will not defile their camp where I dwell in their midst." we see in this brief section more of God's protection. and in the section following...instructions for restitution for when a man has confessed sin. and... regarding the rest of chapter 5, i can honestly say, i do not remember ever having read this! or ever having knowledge of this "adultery test" as my bible subtitles it. i definitely do not remember ever having heard a sermon or lesson with any reference to this/it is interesting that God had provided a way for truth to be exposed in this way. He is a just God.

in chapter 6, we are introduced to the specifics of the nazirite vow-taker...what a special vow/a significant season of life for the nazirite...to be set apart for the Lord.

and then, we read a blessing given through moses/through aaron and his sons to the sons of israel...is it okay if i call this a random blessing? beautiful. just a beautiful blessing randomly between the specifics of the law...i just took the time to see where this blessing fits within the pages of the law. between exodus 20/the 10 commandments...and this blessing, there are 53 chapters and from this blessing to the end of deuteronomy, there are 64 chapters...just wanted to see how close to the middle of these words/pages of the law it happened to fall. and genesis/exodus 1-20 are technically part of the torah as well...just wanted to see how it fell in the midst of these instructional law passages...interesting. interesting to read this random and wonderful reminder of His love and blessing in the midst of the seriousness and gravity and importance and reverence of the law. --personal thoughts-----> :) this makes me think of lecture times with my children when i feel this urgency just to hug them all and remind them even though i'm about rules and keeping them...for their good...i just LOVE them and want to hug them and kiss them and sing to them and bless them....

numbers 6:24-27...

the Lord bless you, and keep you, the Lord make His face shine on you, and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance on you, and give you peace.

bless you, this monday, friends....

intro to numbers and chapters 1-4

--old testament understanding--

according to my textbook, "numbers...is a complex story of unfaithfulness, rebellion, apostasy, and frustration, set against the background of God's faithfulness, presence, provision, and forbearance." the book is divided into three main sections, sort of in three different geographical settings "to mark the main stages of the wilderness march." these sections are as follows: sinai, kadesh, and moab. so, starting in this first section, (and specifically chapters 1-4)...we encounter preparations for departure from the wilderness. there is a first census of the people taken in chapter 1 (the levites being exempted). arrangement of the camps is recorded in chapter 2 and instructions for the duties of the priesthood (the levites) in chapters 3 and 4.

originally, the book of numbers was untitled. numbers was adopted by later translators because of its census lists. according to my reference text, "an obvious purpose of the book is to record the period from the encounter with God at sinai to the preparations in moab to enter the promised land. however, far more than this is involved...." it goes on to indicate that the journey from sinai to kadesh-barnea on their route would normally have only taken eleven days, but that their voyage was a thirty-eight year period which was a consequence for their lack of faith..."none of the unbelieving generation was allowed to enter the land."

--personal thoughts--

my prayer in this quiet hour as i write...Lord, increase my faith in Your character...in Your FAITHFULNESS. i feel sad for the israelites' lack of faith...i want to know You and Your closeness/Your character...and not just so that i won't miss something wonderful in my life/future (as the israelites did/not being permitted to enter canaan)...but so that i won't miss YOU, Father. You are faithful...thank You. thank You for Your faithfulness to the israelites, and thank You for Your consistent, never-ending, never-failing, perfect faithfulness to me, Lord. i love You....

overview of leviticus

--personal thoughts--

i really have felt inspired as i have read through leviticus. i have just kept thinking that God truly does speak to us through His Word...all of His Word...even the texts about the laws given to the israelites that can seem tedious. reading through...i have just had a very real sense of His presence and lovingkindness in all of the law and have had an overwhelming thanksgiving in me somehow for His care for His people...establishing all of this for their well-being, their protection...and of course, their covenant with Him.

--old testament understanding--

i want to walk through leviticus kind of chapter by chapter as i did for exodus as well as providing some historical facts and background for this book...to be posted tomorrow. hoping for a restful weekend for each of you....

.....continued.......................................................................................

in chapters 1-7, laws about the offerings are outlined, including the law of burnt offerings, grain offerings, peace offerings, the law of sin offerings and guilt offerings....note that throughout chapter 4, the idea of atonement and forgiveness is repeated. when the priest made atonement, the law said that they would be forgiven. (i am so thankful for the once-and-for-all atonement of Christ for our sins and the forgiveness that is ours following confession....) chapter 8 records the consecration of aaron and his sons for service, and chapter 9 illustrates aaron's offering of the sacrifices followed by the picture of the fire of the Lord which came out of heaven...consuming the burnt offering. from verses 23 and 24: "when they came out and blessed the people, the glory of the Lord appeared to all the people. then fire came out from before the Lord and consumed the burnt offering and the portions of fat on the altar, and when all the people saw it, they shouted and fell on their faces." wow.... then, chapter 10 records the death of nadab and abihu, aaron's sons who did not follow the instructions of the Lord, offering "strange fire"...and lost their lives. this is sobering and i'm sure much much more than that for aaron and the people. in chapter 11, we learn of God's law for the use of animals for food and in chapter 12, His laws about motherhood (including infant circumcision on the eighth day). in these sections of text, we are reminded again of God's protection and care for His people. there were health reasons for these statutes.... seen again in chapters 13 through 15 concerning the test for leprosy, cleansing of the leper and his home, and cleansing of other unhealthiness. i think the picture of the scapegoat is beautiful as explained in chapter 16...a visual of the iniquities being kind of carried far away from them. significant and notable in chapter 17 is the idea that blood represents life...verse 11: "for the life of the flesh is in the blood...for it is the blood by reason of the life that makes atonement." and in verse 14: "for as for the life of all flesh, its blood is identified with its life...for the life of all flesh is its blood." this idea makes the whole concept of the need for the shedding of blood for the atonement make sense! it is needed because it represents life. chapters 18-22 record necessary laws on immoral relations, on idolatry, laws concerning many other aspects of life and relations between men and between God and men/also regulations concerning priests. note chapter 20, verse 26, "thus you are to be holy to Me, for I the Lord am holy; and I have set you apart from the peoples to be Mine." chapter 23 outlines laws for religious festivals to be observed and the day of atonement. i love the idea of the feast of booths...such a cool remembrance...they actually lived in booths for seven days to physically remember their time in the desert and how they were brought out of the land of egypt. i love how they were instructed to take the foliage of beautiful trees and to rejoice before the Lord in this way. this just seems glorious to me...i've never waved branches and boughs of leafy trees before the Lord in worship (except maybe as a kid in a staged palm sunday service?)...this is beautiful! then, chapters 24-25 record instructions about the lamp and the bread of the sanctuary...other laws and practices (here we see the "eye for an eye" mandate)...instructions about the sabbatic year and the 50th celebration year/the year of jubilee...very cool! also, we see the laws of redemption for the poor.... chapter 26 gives a very clear outline of the blessings of obedience and penalties of disobedience of these laws set forth. He is to be their God...He is the Lord. and chapter 27 records rules concerning valuations....and the chapter (and the book of leviticus) ends with verse 34, stating, "these are the commandments which the Lord commanded moses for the sons of israel at mount sinai."

--personal thoughts--

as i have been studying leviticus, there is really more regarding history and background...um...chapter divisions and themes/the message of this book...than i am able to cover in this post. i want to come back to it, though it is a diversion from my plan for the weekend.... :) i am going to be able to begin posting daily along with the daily reading as i had hoped, but will come back to leviticus as well...because there's more to write. ;)....

history/overview of exodus

--old testament understanding--

the patriarchal age (as mentioned in the postings about the pentateuch) began around 2000 b.c., and extended to around 1200 b.c. when the israelites had settled in palestine. egypt was a great power and, according to my textbook, "palestine lay within the bounds of its sovereignty." i won't go into too much detail about the government and politics of egypt throughout this period, but you get an idea of the enormous influence of egyptian culture when reading the end of genesis and the book of exodus...and the power of the pharoah when reading about his interactions with moses and aaron.

the word, exodus, is derived from the word exodos, meaning "departure." this is a properly descriptive title for this book narrating the details of israel's departure from egypt. my text refers to the exodus as the central event of israel's history. timing of the exodus by many conservative scholars has been concluded to be between 1300 and 1250 b.c./this period having the majority of evidence to support it. if this estimation is accurate, the pharaohs of the oppression would have been seti I (1305-1290) and rameses II (1290-1213)/rameses II having been the pharaoh during the exodus. the route of the israelites' travel was not the normal route from egypt to canaan (known as "the way of the philistines"). in order to avoid egyptian forts and supply stations on that route, they went the "way of the wilderness."

the book of exodus contains so much insight into the history of the israelites...and God's covenant relationship with them. this is illustrated beautifully during moses' interaction with Him at the burning bush. here, God reveals His name in response to moses' questioning. i want to quote my textbook here, which has a wonderful explanation of this: "to grasp the force of moses' question, we must understand that a name in ancient times was bound closely with that person's essence. it expressed one's character. to learn a person's name was to have access to a person's very character. moses is really asking, 'what is God's relationship to the people?' He has been the 'God of the ancestors. who is He now?'" the explanation continues as follows: "'I am who I am' reflects a hebrew idiom in which something is defined in terms of itself...'I am who I am' means 'I am indeed he who is.'...'I am he who is there (for you)--really and truly present, ready to help and to act.'"...and moses was able to see God help and act on behalf of His people through the exodus.

catching it all up. i'm excited!

--schedule for blog through the weekend--

tomorrow (thursday)-completion of thoughts on the pentateuch and genesis.

friday and/or saturday-overview/history notes on exodus.

saturday-overview of leviticus. wow, this book was a fast read! :)

sunday-intro to numbers/numbers 1-4.

this is really exciting to me! i haven't gotten behind because of any lack of enthusiasm, friends...only time management issues...i LOVE this. i looooove studying the bible with friends. if you have fallen a bit behind, let's catch up together. if you have been patiently waiting for me, THANK YOU SO MUCH for your patience. i absolutely LOVE doing this study....

my hope is by monday blogs will accompany daily readings. :)

huge huge love to you....

protection

--personal thoughts--

i've been thinking quite a bit about facebook. blogspot. pinterest. actually, my pinterest account and a dream actually got me thinking.... the dream first? ok...this may sound ambiguous but i prefer leaving the detail lacking to the supply of too much information (and i actually can't remember a lot of the detail now). it was one of those dreams that doesn't really fit in the category of nightmare, but may cause a stirring of discomfort and an awakening with feelings of being disturbed. somehow, in my dream, something that we consider wrong and damaging and harmful had been encountered at a location outside of our home/community but was somehow (whether invited or not) edging it's way toward our home/community. yeah...that is the dream-summation. so...in trying to make sense of the dream, i was thinking about the prevention of this unhealthiness...and the protection of our home/community. and i started thinking about the internet. link to link to link...wrong and damaging and harmful things can be happened upon...accidentally. i got to thinking about this with my pinterest account. every pin has a link to a site, and i have to say that i'm new to pinterest and have realized that so far i have pinned a lot of pictures/ideas but haven't even checked out the link that i posted from that pic that is now on my pinboard.

so, i want to be careful. i read an amaaaazing blog post from a friend of a friend that touched my heart to the core, and i immediately clicked to share it cause i wanted to be an encouragement to others.... but then...i thoughtfully made the decision to delete the shared post because though this article was wonderful, i hadn't read the other dozens of posts from this friend of a friend that my link would link to/wanted to be careful. (i don't know...still thinking on this....)

all of that to say...i have trust issues with the internet. (i even put a disclaimer on my pinterest account profile about this. :) ) i have to be careful. for myself and my family. with youtube. with social networks. with blog sites.... even with pinterest (though honestly, most of it really is all innocent...home ideas/recipes. but then you do have the workout ideas/fitness-type stuff with their plentiful scantily-clothed perfect females). and...please don't misunderstand. i know that other people who link to links from my facebook wall or my pinboard can make their own decisions about what is right and what is wrong. but i know that there are all kinds of people/all kinds of different people...of all ages and generations and levels of maturity...and understanding and carefulness for their own eyes or the eyes of their people (some little people) looking over their shoulders at their computer screens...that may link from a link to something wrong or damaging or harmful.... and not just pictures or videos but printed thoughts.

and...all of that to say...my motive is not fear of the wrong/damaging/harmful but caution and alertness. i peter 5: 8-9a says, "be of sober spirit. be on the alert. your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour. but resist him, firm in your faith...." (italics mine). psalm 101:3 says, "i will set no worthless thing before my eyes." this reminds me of the old song, "be careful, little eyes, what you see. be careful, little eyes, what you see...for the Father up above is looking down in love...so be careful, little eyes, what you see...." His concern is for our safety. our protection.

when i read His law, i think of this. the law was for the provision and protection of God's people. as i look at His law and read through leviticus and numbers and deuteronomy, i want to consider His motive and His character and His heart for His people. He wanted them to be protected from the deception of idolatry and of the devastation of turning toward other gods/all an illusion of satan. He wanted them to be protected from the evil actions of men...setting forth laws to be observed as consequences for intentional harm. His law was for them. to protect them.

looking to His care and His protection over my days/my home/my computer.... praying the same for you, friends....

the second half of exodus/chapters 21-40

--personal thoughts--

i want to start this blog with a prayer...Father, in our studying, we want to KNOW YOU. much of the law is very detailed and can seem tedious, but we don't want to miss anything by skimming over things too quickly or wanting to hurry through the tedious parts. please remind our hearts to ask You when we sit down to read...to speak to us through Your word....

--old testament understanding--

ordinances necessary for the culture of the israelites were set forth by God in the law. chapters 21 and 22 contain ordinances about the keeping/treatment of slaves, consequences/punishment of injury-related crimes and stealing...and other punishable actions and their consequences. chapter 23 continues to outline laws including ordinances concerning the land and observance of the sabbath. feasts that the people were to observe were given in this chapter as well, the feast of unleavened bread, the feast of the harvest, and the feast of the ingathering. also, this chapter gives instruction about their movement into the land which God had promised them. verse 20 reads, "...I am going to send an angel before you to guard you along the way and to bring you into the place which I have prepared." in chapter 24, it is recorded that moses recounted to the people all of these laws/ordinances, and the people responded (verse 3)..."'all the words which the Lord has spoken we will do!'" moses went up on mount sinai and stayed for forty days and nights. scripture says, (v 17), "and to the eyes of the sons of israel the appearance of the glory of the Lord was like a consuming fire on the mountain top." chapters 25-31 record instructions for the design and construction of the tabernacle, the garments of the priests who would serve there, and the ark of the covenant.... as i read these passages, i noted phrases that referred to the purposes of all of this. "for glory and for beauty" (28:2b)-in reference to the holy garments. "for a memorial before the Lord continually" (28: 29b)-in reference to the breastpiece that aaron wore containing the names of the sons of israel. (etc.!) then...chapter 32, of course, is disturbing. in my notes, i wrote, "on the same open pgs in my bible, God is giving instruction about anointing aaron and his sons...then aaron is making them a golden calf/giving it credit for bringing them out of egypt!!" the sons of levi brought war upon the people who had rejected God, as moses instructed.... chapter 33 moves in to instructions for the journey...(v 3) "go up to a land flowing with milk and honey...." He was faithful to continue to guide them on their journey/and to keep His promises to them though they had forgotten Him... we do read about His reference to them as "an obstinate people" (v 3, v 5). and we read about how moses interceded for them. i LOVE 33:15, "...if Your presence does not go with us, do not lead us up from here." but more than that, God's words that moses was responding to, (33:14), "and He said, 'My presence shall go with you, and I will give you rest.'" *they were blessed.* oh and chapter 34 is amazing...i love how God wrote on the tablets again (bc moses had broken the others). i feel like this is illustrative of His patience...His giving a second chance to moses and the people.... from 34:6 note: "the Lord, the Lord God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness and truth; who keeps lovingkindness for thousands, who forgives...." i love that blogspot didn't red-underline that word lovingkindness. i LOVE this word that is so perfectly descriptive of His character. (i just have to say that blogspot does red-underline blogspot. hilarious....:) ) quickly wrapping up chapters 35-40...emphasis on the sabbath is significant in chapter 35. also recorded in this chapter is the account of how blessed the tabernacle project was...:) skilled craftsmen's gifts of their time and talents/contributions brought to the tabernacle/in the next chapter, we read that they had to tell people to stop giving!...(36:6b, "the people were restrained from bringing any more.") chapters 37-39 record details of the construction of the tabernacle and its court/and its completion.... 39:32: "thus all the work of the tabernacle of the tent of meeting was completed; and the sons of israel did according to all that the Lord had commanded moses." the last chapter of exodus records the anointing of the tabernacle and the priests, and we read in 40:35b, "the glory of the Lord filled the tabernacle."

soon to be blogging lots....

stay tuned:)...for completion of unfinished post about pentateuch/genesis, summation of chapters 21-40 in exodus (history/commentary), overview thoughts on the book of exodus, and a happy start to our study of leviticus (even though we're already 4 days in...). love to all....

on eagles' wings

--personal thoughts--

i know you don't need me to tell you what happened in the first 20 chapters of exodus (and won't need me to do the same for chaps 21-40)...because you have been reading and studying this book for yourselves. however, sitting down to complete a blog of overview on this scripture last night and then reading over it was really a helpful and thought-moving experience. just the enormous faithfulness...the treasure of God's faithfulness in and amongst His people shouts out His character. i love Him so much. He is faithful. He was faithful. He moved people (moses, aaron, their mother, jochebed...the pharoah's daughter...jethro and zipporah...) and circumstance and pharoah and water and...and frogs, gnats, flies...He hid the sun for three days...and He moved the red sea into two walls of water!...falling on the israelites' enemies. He made bitter water sweet. He made water come out of a rock. He made flakes of food fall from the sky...and quail...and then, His very presence came into their midst....

let me just...again...type out the words from chapter 19 that are His words...about what He had done. verses 3b and 4 (God was speaking directly to moses): "thus you shall say to the house of jacob and tell the sons of israel: 'you yourselves have seen what I did to the egyptians, and how I bore you on eagles' wings and brought you to Myself.'" (italics mine)....

*so so beautiful.*

i can see the eagle in my imagination. the gracefulness of the rescue...and the safety and security of being brought to Him. i don't in anyway want to mess with the picture in your mind of this...but having watched that scene numerous times at the end of lord of the rings when gandolf came on the eagle to rescue frodo and sam...i can't help but think of it and their ethereal awakening in rivendell. transplanted from the volcanic rock and lava of mordor to the most beautiful, heavenly, safe place...provides an amazing visual of rescue. they had no escape before the eagles came. they felt they knew this was the end...there was no conceivable way for them to have escaped death on their own. and they were rescued...on eagles' wings....

what i need as i read the bible is to understand who God is...and also...who He is in my life. He has rescued me soooo many times. i have seen Him move circumstances...money...people. He has brought answers when i didn't have them. i am soooo thankful this morning for His faithfulness to the israelites. and i am soooo thankful for His faithfulness to me as well...for the way He heard their cry (chap 2:23b-25) and rescued them from 400 years of slavery. and for His interest in my way...oh...and this is true for every one of His children...He is faithful to rescue...and it is always as beautiful as the flight on the wings of eagles.